


TIMEBREAKER

by Iouistomlinson



Category: One Direction (Band)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-09-10 13:54:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8919673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iouistomlinson/pseuds/Iouistomlinson
Summary: Harry Styles makes a lot of mistake in life, and the worst yet was to kiss his best friend, Louis Tomlinson. That until he finds something that might change that .
Where Harry could timetravel and he tried to re-do every mistake he made, what harm could it bring?





	1. Chapter 1

_It was a really dark night. The bar full of flashing lights everywhere were packed with people from all over the neighbourhood. The very time it happened, it was just a drunken mistake. A mistake that he wished he didn't make, obviously._

_It's pretty much obvious that both of them were high out of their mind. They were grinding on each other like never before. Touching and lots. But it's normal for them to do stuff like that._

_They were best friends after all._

_And best friends do weird things._

_It starts out just innocent. Touching hands and dancing together. They would laugh together at the stupid jokes they made and everything was just fine and fantastic. It was just a casual great night._

_Drink and more drinks, most of the night were overall blurry, but Harry couldn't help but replaying the scenes of the horrible tragedy. It was the very moment he lost his best friend._

_The love of his life._

_His loubear._

_He was desperate. The plump lips of Louis got him very curious. The lips that perfectly fitted his', that he'd always wanted to taste._

_He thought why not? Will they even remember all this the next morning? He's pretty damn sure Louis was as drunk as he is at the very moment. He wouldn't remember. He wouldn't know. Though that's pretty sadistic to say the least._

_It was just a peck on the lip at first. He froze for awhile before slowly kissing back, seeming unsure of what's going on._

_His lips fits mine so well that he never ever wanted to kiss another person his whole life. He thought. He was hypnotized by the heavenly taste of Louis' mouth. It would be a lie if he said that it isn't the best kiss he'd ever had. It definitely is. Harry never wanted it to end._

_But it did. Nothing lasts forever, does it?_

_After the small peck turned into a tounge battle. Suddenly, he felt a hard pressed hand on his cheeks, leaving it to sting badly. It was then when he realized, it was his Lou slapping him._

_Harry's eyes formed into watery tears. Louis gasps as he realized what he'd done and gulped. He had never slapped Harry before, yet alone hit him. They rarely even have arguments._

_They were the bestest of friends, though Harry had always wanted more._

_"I-I, Wh-Why did you do that!?" Louis managed to let the word slip out of his mouth. "I have a girlfriend, Haz! For crying out loud, I have a  g i r l f r i e n d!"_

_Harry gulped at the sight of a really frustated Louis. And he knew, that this is nowhere near good at all. It isn't gonna end well._

_He stare at the blank white tiles, fiddling his fingers nervously. I can't bare to look at his eyes. "Louis. Look, I-I'm sorry. I-I don't know.." I croaked out, holding the falls of tears. "Y-You see-I was.." He added._

_Louis folded his hand into a fist. He took a deep breath, trying to calm down. But obviously, it wasn't working. "Forget about it, Styles! You're ruining it," Louis snapped at him. The tears running down Harry's cheeks even more. "For fuck sake! Stop crying. You're such a crybaby. Ugh!"_

_Louis knew he was over-reacting a bit, or maybe a lot. He was being mean, he realized. But Louis thought he deserved that._

_Before Harry even managed to speak, Louis shook his head multiple times. "You know what? That's it. You're ruining us! God, what if Eleanor know about this. What would she say!?" Louis rambled and huffed._

_Harry scanned the room, worried if anyone heard their argument. Luckily, everyone's minding their own business. Harry lets out a relief sigh._

_"Well..you kissed back..." Harry muttered slowly, convinced that he doesn't hear it well enough._

_But Louis heard it all so well. He knew it was partly his fault for kissing Harry back. But he wanted to believe that he didn't do it. That he didn't just kissed his best friend. So, he put all the blame on Harry with less of a guilt._

_The waves of silence hits them, it all become awkward for awhile when Louis was deep in his thought._

_He didn't know why he even kissed back. He seriously didn't. He just thought that Harry's lips tasted so magical on his. No! He's just pitying him. That's why he did that. He didn't like the kiss at all._

_But if so, why did you let him do it? Louis thought to himself._

_Louis shook his head in disbelief. The kiss meant nothing to him! He said to himself._

_Call him crazy because he just had a mental argument with himself but at that point, nothing else matters. He was dead pissed at the curly haired lad._

_Harry was still looking nervously at thr ground, not moving even one bit._

_Louis rolls his eyes before taking one last sip of his drink. He decided that it was his call to leave._

_With that thought, he said without hesitation. "I'm leaving!" Louis ran towards the bar door gate and left without taking a second glance on his best mate who he just left alone._

_Harry wanted to chase him but really, all he could do is stare at the ground, feeling all guilty._

_He just ruined someone's relationship. He just kissed him. He kissed his best friend. It's almost impossible per say, he felt guilty yet satisfied. He'd never had any kiss nowhere as perfect as it was kissing him._

_He knew so well that crushing on his best mate, who have a really lovely girlfriend isn't the best decision to do. But he can't help it._

_He can't help falling in love with Louis Tomlinson. With his blue as the ocean eyes, his cheeky smile, the way his eyes crinckles when he smiles, his playful act, his soft feathery brown hair. What's there not to love about him? To Harry, he's the definition of perfection. He knew the perfect one doesn't exist, but when it comes to Louis, everything he does is perfect._

_Too bad he's taken and that he'll never be mine._

_Because to Louis, Harry Styles was just a friend, and that's all they'll ever be._

_Friends. And just friends._

_Harry thinks Louis and Eleanor are perfect for each other. They both have endless, irresistible beauty. Both of them are nice, genuine people. Eleanor is nice to everyone, even Harry. Louis and Eleanor are the dream couple. He doesn't see them seperating anytime soon._

_Eleanor is just so beautiful. So good. He can't even compare himself to her. He's a 6 and she's a 10. She's so fit, he's insecure._

_Harry is absolutely nothing, when it comes to Eleanor. Harry just really wished he's in Eleanor's shoes. Harry really wished Louis loves him as much as he loves Eleanor, or maybe even more than that. He wishes that they could kiss whenever, wherever they go. Harry wishes thay he could wake up everyday with the angelic human being by his side._

_It's unfair but it's what all life's all about._

_He comes to realization that he needed to accept the cruel fact that Louis and him are absolutely nothing but friends. He wasn't even sure if they're still friends after what just happened._

_If it did affect their friendship, Harry wouldn't forgive himself and he'd blame it on him his whole life. It was his own fault that now he's in this tragic situation._

_Kissing Louis was the best and worst decision he'd ever made_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, well, wellington.
> 
> So this is it, the first chapter. Yay! (Look, i'm talking to myself again bc no one reads my story :))
> 
> Sorry if it's confusing and stuff. I didn't even know what I'm writing. It's 3am and sleep is for the weak.
> 
> And I think that's a flashback? Or is it not? I DON'T KNOW DON'T ASK ME.
> 
> Sorry for the horrible writing and grammar. And don't be suprsise if I'd never continue this story because I never finished any of mine. Oops (Hi)


	2. Chapter 2

The very next day, he couldn't sleep well with the thought of the horibble incident that happened last week. He was up until 4am until he felt really sleepy, so he decided it was his time to finally sleep. He woke up on 8am with a massive headache, probably because of the lack of hours of sleeping. His eyes were still swollen from crying hard.

He really should get over it, it isn't healthy to cry every night and it happened since the night it happened. He realized that the thing happened and there's no way that he could get a time machine and rewind the mistake. That's impossible.

His loud thoughts were eating him alive each day. Louis hasn't spoken to him ever since that day. He tried to contact Louis, of course but not even once had he answered. Truth be told, without Louis his life become very lonely and boring. Ever since Eleanor came into the picture, we rarely hang out but back then he always make some time for me. But now, I haven't even heard his voice in a week.

The thought of Louis leaving me is like the worst nightmare I've ever had. And the fact that it's actually happening right now makes it even more wonderful. Note the sarcasm.

I sighed as the sun rays shines right through me and decided it was time to get out of my bed and living another boring day, like always. I stretched his arm wide, letting out a loud yawn. I reached out my long arms, identifying my phone on the table. When I finally got it, I check the notification bar to see Niall messaging me.

I quickly open the text message.

 

**Niall:**   
**Wanna hang out later? You've been distant..**

 

I sighed. I wasn't really in the mood for hanging out. I'm not really in the mood for anything, really. I just want to stay in bed and sleep all day, as boring as it sounds. But Niall's true, I've been distant lately. It's mostly because of what happened between Louis and I.

So, I thought maybe I should just go out this time. There wouldn't be any harm, wouldn't it?

I think for awhile, and finally made my last decision that I'd finally to go outside for once after staying home all week.

 

**Harry:**   
**Yeah. Sure, when and where?**

 

Withing minutes, I'd already gotten a reply from him.

 

**Niall:**   
**Starbucks. 3pm-ish? I can pick you up if you want**

 

**Harry:**   
**Uh, no...it's fine. I'll drive my car. Thanks.**

 

**Niall:**   
**Oh ok. See you later x**

 

**Harry:**   
**Bye xx**

 

I sent the text and finally get out of bed. I make my way to the empty kitchen and treat myself a nice and simple breakfast. While eating, I decided to scroll over instagram. Eating while staring at the wall doesn't really makes me feel any better and it's quite boring, don't you think?

I scroll from pictures to pictures, liking every single pictures I've seen. _Boring_ , I thought. It's only 8 in the morning, no one posts pictures at times like these. Most people wouldn't even been awake at such times. I'm just an early rise, 's all.

I liked a few more pictures until I decided that I had enough of Instagram. I finished my cereal with a few more spoons and put it into the empty sink to wash it for later.

So now, I don't really have anything to do. Maybe I should open Instagram again. I know, I have an amazing life. Maybe I'd find something interesting there, who knows.

I opened the app with a bored look and continue to scroll over hundrers of pictures, like before. That until a picture took my breath away, literally.

My breath hitched at the sight of the unpleasing picture. I gulped, biting my lip. My lips twitched into a deep frown. I feel so purely upset. Devastated. I feel so devastated. My heart broke into a million tiny pieces. It feels like he whole words suddenly crashes onto me all at once. I put my hand over my mouth and started biting my fingers, showing signs of frustation.

Harry shuts his eyes closed in betrayal and took a glance at the picture again.

 

**louist91**

❤ **128 likes**  
 **louist91** My lovely girlfriend _@eleanorj92_ I love you lots ! Forever. I'm a lucky lad :) xxx  
 _View all 18 comments_  
 **zaynmalik** Aww cuties!  
 **louist91** _@zaynmalik_ :) !  
 _20 minutes ago_

 

It's so pathetic, really. To get sad over a normal photo. He saw pictures of Louis and Eleanor all the time because Louis always posts them everywhere, almost as it's to get me jealous. It's all he every posted about , really. He always feels like Louis shouts I AM IN FACT STRAIGHT, everytime Harry and him hangout ever since there's Eleanor. It's always about her.

But I can't help but feeling so upset over it everytime he did. He just really dislike seeing Eleanor and him together, eventhough Eleanor is a really nice girl and all.

He don't want to admit that he's jealous of the poor girl, but that's exactly what he's feeling. Jealousy is written all over his face everytime he sees Louis with her.

I shook my head and groaned. And so, he spend that day bawling his eyes out and let out all the emotion his feeling on the bed that was once made for two.

 

  ▤ ▥ ▦  

 

It is finally 3pm. Thank god. I can finally get out of this house and do something without looking like the loner I am. I'm finally over the rather...cute picture.

Right now, I won't let anyone ruin my mood, not even Louis. I'm just gonna be all happy and smiling with my new appearant best friend, Niall. Not really...No one, absolutely no one can replace his Lou. Well, not his Lou anymore.

I finally started the car and drives it. The way from my home to Starbucks takes about 10 minutes. The short and silent drive finally ended and I get out of my car, looking for a certain fake-blonde haired with a thick irish accent.

When I finally spot Niall, I immeaditely take a seat in front of him. Niall takes his eyes away from his phone when he realized that I'm finally here.

"Harry! You're here!' Niall said in enthusiasm. I grinned at him. "Well, I guess I am, or else you won't see me" I joked and he chuckled.

"Go order first, I already ordered mine" I nod and walked to the counter. A girl with a long, wavy blond hair is the cashier. She waves at me friendly. I awkwardly waves back at the stranger.

"Hi! Welcome to Starbucks. May I take your order, babe?" She said, twirling her hair. I cringed at the nickname but decided to let it go.

"Uhm—Yeah. I want a Caramel Latte, please.." I said, my voice turned sligtly deeper and raspier. She smirked and nod and went to the back, probably making my order.

When she's back with my Caramel Latte, she asked for my name. I wasn't sure if I should lie or just give her my real name. So, I decided to just tell her. There wouldn't be no harm anyway.

"Uhm..Harry" I mumble.

She nod, writing my name to the cup using a sharpie. "Hmm...Harry. I like it" She winked at me and I grab the cup and leave. Well, that was weird.. Is fhat flirting or being friendly? Either way, he wouldn't date her because well, he's gay. Though, he admits that she is a very beautiful person.

I make my way to my seat to see Niall with his drink already. Niall is slurping the cup like he hasn't drink for months. I rolled my eyes.

I drink a gulp of my drink. "So, Harry. How'd you been?" Asked Niall with curiousity.

I haven't told Niall about what happened. I didn't even told Niall that I love my own best friend and the fact that I am gay. I don't think that would be necessary.

"Um, good? Not exactly..but I'm fine. What about you?" I returned the question to him. He made a thoughtful look, which I chuckled at. "I've been fantastic, sir" I laughed out loud at his cheekiness.

That's why I love hanging out with Niall. He always makes everything feels better eventhough it's not. It's like he never had any problem at all with his spontenous act. He never failed to make me feel good in seconds, even just by hearing him laugh at stupid things.

I take a sip of my drink again when suddenly a note slips from the bottom of the cup.  I hovered my eyes go the onr and pick it up as I opened the small note.

_**xxx-xxx-xxxx** _   
_**call me, boo? x ;) ♥** _

I groaned and Niall furrowed his eyebrows. "What is that, Harry?" I shook my head, muttering quiet nothing.

Niall doesn't look satisfied as he quickly get out of his seat and taking the note from me. And the next thing I knew, the note was already in his hand. I gasped, "Niall!"

He grins, "Ooooh, little Harold have an admirer! Who is it? Is it that girl from the counter? Harry!"

I blushed slightly when I realized that some eyes were laid on us. I smacked him. "Shut up, Niall. You're attracting attention"

Niall huffed. "I don't care. Details. Now. Is it really that girl?"

I mumbled a low "Maybe..." And suddenly Niall gasped dramatically. "Dude! I was trying to hit on her since I arrived here. Unfair!" Niall pouted, crossing his arm. I laughed lighyly, "Too bad, man. Kidding, you can have her. I have an eye on someone anyway.." I blurted out.

"WHAT!" Niall suddenly shouts, attracting more attention than before. I flinched. "Why didn't you tell me anything? Dude! You never tell me anything" He huffed.

Just great. I shouldn't have said that. Now what do I tell him? It was accidentally anyway..but still. I, most definitely wouldn't tell him that I'm gay. What if he's homophobic? I pursed my lips. Will Niall accept me? He'd been friends with me for years, sure and I tell him almost everything. But I'm still not quite ready.

"Harryyyyy" He said, dragging the letter Y. "Tell me, please!" He cried out like a baby.

"Um—"

"Harry!"

What do I tell him. My mind is racing fast and my mouth work faster than my mind when I accidentally said something I shouldn'tve.

Niall gasped as the name slipped out of my mouth. I can't even believe I said that. Fucking amazing.

"Harry! Oh my god!" Niall said, he shook his head slowly, giving me a pity look. I mentally face-palmed myself for being so stupid.

How do you take your words back? If only I could time-travel? Wouldn't that be just nice..

"I-um, yeah.. I have for awhile?" I said, the statement coming out more like a question. I really wanted to deny it but I can't find a way how. Now I'm trapped.

Niall pat my back slowly. "Aw, Harry! That's so sad. I'm so sorry. I promise I won't tell Louis about your little crush..."

Don't say it, don't say it. Please.

"..on his girlfriend. You deserve someone much better!"

I literally want to kill myself at that exact moment for being so fucking dumb. Now Niall thought I'm in love with Eleanor, while it's the opposite. I despise her.

I just smile fakely and nod. "Uhm..Thanks Niall.." Niall smiled sheepishly. "No problem. If you have any problems. You can always tell me!"

I nod once again, muttering to myself. "Yeah. I'd rather not...." Thankfully, Niall didn't hear one bit if it.

After that, we spent the day talking and talking. We talked about everything, really. From the politics to the grandma next door to the topic of our exes, which I cringed at because back then I didn't knew I was gay, or maybe I'm bi? or I'm just louis-sexual.

Niall said he'd only dated one girl, back in Ireland. I'd only dated like 3 to 4 girls my whole life, though girls always throw themselves all over me.   
It's not that I'm full of myself or anything—but it's kinda the truth.

But sadly, all of the relationships I had was one-sided so..

As I hear him chattering about his exes, suddenly Niall shouted someone's name that I knew so well.

"Louis! You came!" Niall said in joy.

All I could do is hoping that it's a different Louis. Please let it be. Please.

"Hey Niall..Sorry I'm late. Was hanging out with Eleanor"

Of fucking course. It's his Louis. His Louis that always hang out with Eleanor.  I'm so not ready to see him. And I don't think he does either.

Niall and Louis started chatting together, ignoring my existence. Until I fake-coughed, which caught both attention, even Louis. Of course he just saw me. I'm invisible to him.

I build up my courage to talk infront of Louis. "Um, Thank for today, Ni. But..I-I have to go"

Niall frowned. "Why? Louis just arrived! Let's hang out together" I look over to Louis, but he's just faving the floor, he doesn't even take a single glance on me.

"It's fine. I just really have to do something, like—right now. So, yea. Bye Niall" I said goodbye to Niall, not bothering to say goodbye to him. If he can ignore me, then I can too.

With that said, I immeaditely get up and leave.

Two can play that game, Tomlinson. I huffed, starting my car.

It won't start, what the fuck? I tried to start the engine it again, but it still won't start. I groaned. Now, how do I go home? Walk? Or do I ask Niall?

Thinking about all this started to make my head dizzy. If I asked Niall, then I'd have to meet Louis again, and boy I most definitely don't want to.

After lots of stupid ideas, I finally realizes something. Oh yeah, I can just call Niall. I started searching for my phone in my pocket.

Nothing.

It's in the fucking Starbucks.

Beside Louis.

The day couldn't get any better.  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is 2.4k, legit the longest chapter I've written, as sad as it sounds like.  
> I actually never been to Starbucks so..I'm sorry if there's any mistake.  
> It's horribly written so I'm really sorry for that :( x  
> Bye. Have a good day.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of it are Harry's POV unless stated, or sometimes its a third person POV. I'm so unmanaged, so yeah. Bare with me. :)

I scowled loudly when the sudden beam of lights flashed its' way towards me. Not the ideal way to wake up, really. Since when did I even fell asleep?

I opened both of my eyes as wide as I can. I blinked it multiple times due to the shiny lights blinding me. This isn't my bed, and this is not definitely my room. What happened last night? The last thing I remembered was me falling asleep in my car. Suddenly, I'm in a stannger's bed, alone.

It's childish, really. I don't want to get in the shop just because Louis' in there. It's supposed to be just an hour thing, I'm just gonna have to wait until Louis left.

But when Nouis hang out, it's never just a 10 minutes thing. Louis always makes all the conversation better that makes the partner never wanna leave and keep chatting all day long. He has that effect on everyone.

I really hope it was Niall's bed. But that's impossible, we hung out multiple times at his house and I knew so well this isn't his bed. Maybe he has an extra house? I really really hope so. Maybe it's Louis and Eleanor's house? Could make sense, because I never went there since Louis always complained about how Eleanor doesn't want the house to get messy and stuff. That's impossible too, after what happened I'm almost sure Louis won't do this. And I'd rather woke up in a stranger'd bed rather than Louis and Eleanor's.

I rolled over the bed and suddenly my phone came out of nowhere. Probably slipped out from somewhere. But my phone was supposed to be at the shop? But thank god, It's here.

I checked my phone, the clock showing that it's 7 in the morning. And there were two messages from Niall. I quickly open it.

 **Niall** :  
 **You ok?** **?**

 **Niall** :  
 **Hope you arrive there fine**

I closed the text messages. Oh so Niall knew where I am? That must've mean that I'm not in his house. I sighed at the thought, dissapointment waves over me. Then who's house am I staying?

It couldn't possibly be Louis'.

Maybe I should just go downstairs and check it. Great idea, should've thought that sooner. I immeaditely get out of the bed, taking my phone with me. I make my way downstairs slowly, peeking from it.

I walk down the staircase, taking each steps slowly. I muttered a quiet "Shit", when suddenly I tripped one of it, making me fall backwards. Luckily, it just hit my bum.

I took quick glance at the surrounding. This house is pretty big. Thankfully, there's no one in sight, but the TV's still playing. Who does that? Maybe I should close it. I'm just being nice and all, saving the eletric since the owner basically saved my day. I make my way to living room.

I walk steps by steps quietly and when i finally reached there, I closed the TV shut.

I heard someone snoring very near. Is that the owner? I heard him mumbling some stuff that I couldn't quite reach. But I hear one of it so well. I froze.

"H-Harry.." He mumbles quietly, but I can still hear it. He knows me. The owner knows me, I let out a sigh of relief. That means I wasn't at someone unknown's.

Wait. Oh god, so he caught me. What if he thinks I did something bad. I'm not ready to face him but I knew I should.

So, slowly I turn my back and closed my eyes shut. Flinching my nose, I let out a quick

"Uhmyousee..IwasntdoinganythingIwasjust.."

No answer. I opened my eyes one per one. I gulped.

When I turn my back, I wasn't quite expecting a person lying on the couch, snoring softly.

And I most definitely wasn't expecting Louis, still sleeping and smiling in his sleep, looking so cute and cuddly.

I was startled. No, I was very suprised and shocked. I feel my anxiety risen up and I feel like getting chocked. When I finally felt a little relieved, I  let out a loud breath.

So, it is him, afterall. It was him who bring me to his house. But he shared a house with Eleanor. Then, where is Eleanor? It's 7:30 and Eleanor seems like the early riser type, if I must say. But like most people would say, don't judge a book by it's cover. I'm not bad-mouthing her..

On seconds thoughts, maybe I should just get up and leave before Louis or Eleanor noticed me. He wouldn't want to talk to me too, I bet. He's just being the amazing human-being he is.

I walked to the front door, openingnit and took one last glance on Louis. I really wished I could cuddle him to death. I smiled slightly. I can't help but smiling and admiring his beauty whenever I look at him. He has that effect on everyone, too.

I smiled softly before taking a step out of the house. When I heard him muttering "Harry..". I stopped my next step and turn my face once again.

He's still sleeping calmly, yet he called my name, twice. Is he dreaming about me? No way, maybe he's having a nightmare about me and I'm the devil or something. Sounds more like it.

God, I really wish I could kiss him right now, even just a peck on the cheek.

And that's exactly what he did. He fluttered his eyes shut and start kissing his Louis softly on the cheek, nkt caring if anyone sees him. Louis smiled tenderly. I fan-boyed quietly when he smiled. Louis Tomlinson is the death of him.

He knows how wrong that is, he kissed him twice already. But Louis' sleeping and he looks so cute. Harry can't contain his hormones and decided kissing him for the third timenwouldn't be such a bad idea. Louis' still sleeping deeply and it's the oerfect opportunity.

This time, he kissed him on the lips. Sparks, fireworks and butterflies flew all around his stomach like it's the 4th  
of July when Louis kissed him back with so much passion.

When Louis opened his eyes, Harry knew.

He fucked up, again.

**Louis' POV**

Louis slowly opened his eyes, when all his shit finally came together. In his dreams, he was kissing Harry, which strangely feels so real and he can't help but liking it so much. So he kissed back, because what's wrong with that?

So, in the so-called-dream, he kissed Harry with so much pleasure. He felt guilty, of couse but it's just a dream. No one will know. Except him. Not Eleanot. Not Harry. Absolutely no one. He felt so bad for enjoying it so much that his chest started beating repeatedly and he never wanted it to stop.

Louis was curious of how can it all feels so real, so good.

When he's finally waking up, realization hits him faster than the quiet air. he realizes that it wasn't a dream and it's actually real. He's kissing the real Harry for the second time. He's cheated on his girlfriend, for the second time. He enjoyed kissing Harry, for the second time.

I pushed Harry away, who looks at me in horror. He shook his head multiple times, trying to form a word. "I-I.."

Harry winced at my action, looking at everywhere but me.

Harry shuffled his arm awkwardly, staring at the ground. "Yeah, um. I should go. Sorry. Thanks for letting me stay the night."

Harry stood up, and within seconds, he's already out of my sight. I groaned. I'm not fixing anyhing, and I ruined it again.

I go after him, luckily he's still putside of my house. I take a peak from the front door.

Harry was calling someone and by the look of it, he seems very frustated. Must've been because of me.

"Uh, Niall. Finally.." He said. He lets out his arm fly freely.

"Yes, Niall. Hi. Please pick me up. What? No. Pleaseeee, Niall. I need you. Uhm..Louis' still sleeping and yeah, I need to get home soon. Fine. I'll treat you Nandos, just pick me up"

By the sound of it, it seems like Harry told Niall to pick him up from my house? I shook my head in disbelief. We might not have the best bond at the moment, but I'd always help him if he needs a ride or something. This is ridiculous.

I walk to him and grabbed his left hand, who's not holding anything. He turned away to look at me and mutters a "Um, wait there Niall..or just pick me up fast" to his phone.

Before I got the chance to speak, Harry cuts me off. "Look, Louis. If you could just..forget about it. I get it if you don't want to be friends with me anymore. I totally get it. If we want to play the ignoring game, then bring it on. I don't care anymore. I'm sorry, okay. You'll make this harder. If you don't want me in your life anymore, then leave me be. I'm sorry." He said, his eyes showing signs if sorrow, it's not as green as it used to be.

His words cuts me like the knife, I didn't meant to make him feel that way. I wasn't really ignoring him..or maybe I am. I was just too caught up with Eleanor so I could forget the kiss. And yeah, I didn't accept his calls, that's because..

I don't really have a particular reason. I know how much of a bad person I am.

"I-I'm sorry too..but atleast let me send you home. I might be a bad friend or person, but.."

Right before I get to finish my words, a loud honk was heard in my parking lot. And I immeaditely recognized it as Niall's car.

Harry nod, before muttering "Bye" and went inside the car with Niall. I returned the bye lowly.

He fucked up, again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I knew how badly-written this is. I don't know, but all I know is that I wanted to finish this story.  
> And today's is 24th Dec 2016. Our boobear is turnung 25! Can you believe that? Well, I can't.  
> And yay, Louis' POV!!  
> I know no one reads the stoey, but I like talking to myself, so it's all good.  
> Bye x


	4. Chapter 4

It's Sunday night. That night, Harry cried himself to sleep, and it's becoming a habit of him since the past week. Everytime he's trying to have a nice deep sleep, he keeps thinking about how much of a fuck-up he is. He really wished he can just go back and time and rewind everything, but wishes don't always come true, do they?

The moon and the stars doesn't shine as bright as it was the day before, he noticed. It feels like everything isn't what it's used to. Just like Louis and him.

11p.m. He was ready for bed. He turned his alarm clock on. Turn his phone off and put it beside his pillow. He smacked his plain white pillow to make it fluffier. He dressed himself on the wide comfortable blanket. He's definitely ready to sleep. But he couldn't.

"Anytime from now.." He groaned, looking down on his watch.

He can't play with his phone because that'd make him harder to sleep, though he so badly wanted to do so. All he could do is stare at the wall and hoping he'd fell sleep soon. He has to wake up early tomorrow for more job application. He's been searching for a new job for quite a few months now, ever since he got fired from his old job. It's stupid. All he did was mistook someone's order and exactly that day he got the best announcement ever. Since then, he's been struggling to find a new one.

He's still young, being only 22 at the moment. He could continue learning at some university and such, but he wasn't the smartest person nor the richest person. And his relationship with his parents are pretty complicated. He's only in contact with his older sister, Gemma.

It's harder for him to find a job since he's still inexperienced. He only had one job his whole life, that is working as a waiter at a pretty qualified restaurant, well until he got fired. He doesn't like working there that much. Everyone there is so strict and professional, while he's still new at everything. And the main boss is very mad. Real mad. The only reason that he'd still done it was because of the payment and his friends would occasionally visit him every week, so that makes him a bit happier. The only reason he got the job is because his close friend, Ed works there and the lower manager just happened to be his cousin. I'm very thankful for the opportunity though.

He continued to stare at the empty wall, distracting himself, trying everything to let himself sleep. From counting sheeps to just closing his eyes. He felt so lonesome, laying on the single bed. When he's lonely, he always thinks too much, which isn't exactly the best thing. Sometimes he'd go too far and tried to do things that he shouldn't. Which, I'd rather not say.

When the thoughts of Louis contained him, he tried to shake it away as soon as possible. He's really sensitive about the topic. But as much as he tried shaking away the thoughts of how Louis would never love him back the way he does, instead he found himself in a pool of his own tears.

He missed Louis so much but he knew he shouldn't. He messed Louis up so bad. He felt so bad for Eleanor, but he doesn't regret any single moment of kissing him.

He really should just move on, he do believe that there's someone better than Louis, but the other part of him can't see anyone more perfect than Louis. Because Louis is too perfect. And Louis isn't, and will never be mine.

Harry knows he's very messed up. He's been so miserable since the first time it happened, that was a month ago. He couldn't ever forget it. And then a week later, he kissed him again, he can't even believe he did that.

A whole month, Louis and him haven't been in contact for a month. It's not that he expected Louis to call him or at least just greet him a hi. It's just that Louis and I's friendship was so good, it's such a waste that it ended just like that.

"Goodnight," He mutters to himself before he fell asleep as the tears still rolling down his cheek like the november rain.

 

▤ ▥ ▦

 

I took a big gulp of the rich tea in concentration as I continued searching for job offers in the newspaper. Most of them were either about being a cleaner or working in a garage, which isn't really the best option. Maybe he should just walk around the town, looking for poster of job offers hanging around the street. He'd be really greateful even if he works at KFC. I heard you can get free food there, I bet Niall would love to work there.

This newspaper is so bullshit. There's literally only two options there and no more, no less. How am I supposed to pay my bills when my money is getting lessen every day. From all I knew, I could be bankrupt by tomorrow. Thank goodness the amount of money he has are still enough to pay everything at the moment.

Harry swipes his hair, grabbing it tight. He's so frustated. How is he gonna keep living when almost every interview he'd been rejected im and all the jobs sucks. When he was little, he didn't knew it would be this hard to find a job. But being young and naive, everything seems easier to you except learning and studying.

If he's bankrupt, he hopes Niall or Louis let him stay at their's. Okay, Louis definitely wouldn't. And he knows Niall loves him, but not that much.

This is nonsense, of course he'll get a job. He will have a new job. He has to have a job.

Harry tucks his curly hair behind his ear as he stared deeply at the newspaper as if it's gonna change something. At the moment, all he cares about is finding a job as fast as possible.

He never knew adulthood could be so hard.

After a few more searches, he decided he'll just walk around the town instead of looking at the newspaper over and over when there's literally no other option.

He went to the small kitchen and put the pan on the stove. He decided to treat himself a nice meal before searching for more jobs. After finished cooking the pancake, he sits by the kitchen table and eat by himself. It gets a little lonely sometimes when you live by yourself. He missed Louis' loud laugh and tickle fights and everything about him, when he still lives here. Of course, before Eleanor came into the picture. He can't blame Eleanor, really because he'd do anything for Louis even if it means leaving his best friend.

He don't know what's up with Louis now. That makes sense, since he hasn't seen him in a month. He just hopes Louis' okay and all smiling. He really wished he's the reason for his laugh though. But when there's someone like Eleanor, everything seems impossible to him.

The whole room feels really cold all of sudden. So he decided he should eat beside the warm fireplace. It's only 1 in the noon at the moment and it wasn't raining or windy. It's almost as if something was calling him to come over the fireplace. He puts his plate of pancakes on the wooden table beside the fireplace. He picked up the small blanket from the floor and put it on. He lets out a breathy sigh, shuffling both of his palm together.

He stared deeply as the fire ignites. He wished he's as fierce as the fire. When the wind blows it, it might fall down a bit but then it'll rise up again and continued to rise. He wished he can confront his problem and apologize to Louis. It's funny how everything is about Louis nowadays. He can't take his mind off him when the guilts were eating him alive. He hates being the reason of a breakup of a healthy relationship, maybe. He wouldn't know what happened since Louis and him weren't in contact anymore, but it seems like they're still together and happy, which sucks for Harry.

He took another bite of his pancake, munching it slowly. His thoughts were all over the place now. He's not sure if he's thinking about the job or Louis, maybe even both. Evrey single thing he saw reminds him of Louis. The red small couch reminds him of when Louis used to sleep there when they had silly small fights, which never even lasted a day. The glass cup which Louis used to drink his drink. He gulped when he started imagining Louis drinking. It doesn't make sense how can he still think Louis is hot when he's doing that. Everything about Louis turned him on, if we're being honest.

He's now staring into the space. His body is full of sweats running all over him. He felt hotter than usual, especially on his left arm. He felt like his left arm were literally burned. What if it is? Realization still hasn't caught him yet, he continues to stare nowhere. He felt like dying, but that's what he always wanted, ever since Louis left him. But he's still too young to die.

"F-Fuck.." He mumbled. He winced, jumping out from his seat a little when a fire poker suddenly fell on him. It caught him by suprise.

Just then, he realized that his hand were burning. Literally burning. He immeaditely stand up and take the glass of tea and pour it. He's just lucky he was wearing the blanket, which covered most of the the fire spot.

All of sudden, a fire poker fell onto him, making him wince. Since when does he even have a fire poker? He shrugged carelessly before taking the fire poker.

He picked the fire poker up, when suddenly everything felt so dizzy and suddenly lots of images flashed in his mind. It's all happening so fast, which panicked him. His breath hitched and he let go of the firepoker that's now on the floor. He blinked his eyes multiple times. His eyebrows twitched, thinking of what just happened. He took a deep breath before lowering his body to reach the fire poker again.

Everything felt so surreal. Sudden flashing images of what happened a few minutes ago were replaced to what happened before it and it goes again and again. And after everything become too much, he lets go of it again.

What just happened?

He bites his lips hard, not caring if it's bleeding. He was so confused about what just happened. How did all the sudden memories came into his mind when he touched the fire poker? Is it a coincidence or just my imagination? Impossible, he felt it himself, it's definitely real. The fire poker is definitely something. Something strange, may I add.

He decided to use it again, but started focusing on it more this time. He grabbed the fire poker tight and closed his eyes shut for more concentration. It was all black at first when suddenly everything is zoomed in and now he can see it more clearly. More flashback came into his mind one per one from when his blanket burned to when he was eating the pancake, and then now the iconic kiss that haunted his mind for months now came into his mind. It's all in black and white, strangely. Right when the kiss appeared, he lost his focus which makes him accidentally dropped the fire poker, again. Everytime he thought about the kiss, he can't help but feeling like crying all day.

When he realized he left his mouth open wide, he instantly closed it. He gulped, now feeling scared. He'd tried to avoid thinking about the kiss for weeks, so it's definitely not him controlling his mind when he touched the fire poker. He didn't knew what to do with it, but it must have to do with something, right? What's the use of getting flashbacks when you can't do anything with it. That's when he decided to think that it might be useful for one thing in particular. He really hope it would work. He lets out a deep sigh, he picked up the fire poker for the 3rd time, closing his eyes shut once again, trying to focus.

He thinks about when he put the plate of pancake beside the fireplace while grabbing the fire poker. _Please work. Please work._ The black background came into his mind again, before suddenly everything's spinning around for about 5 seconds. In the other side of his mind, he's still thinking about the situation.  His head's becoming more dizzy when the black and white spiral spins faster. And then fast flashing images of the flashback appeared.

Abruptly, he flutter his eyes open. He's now beside the fireplace with an uneaten pancake and not-burned blanket. "W-What?" He croaked out, not believing what just happened. He just travelled back in time. He did it. "Oh god-Oh!" He jumps in joy, gasping. He couldn't at all believe what just happened, but it did. He saw and feel it himself. He didn't even know things like this actually exist. He felt so lucky to actually experience it.

It's a lot to take in. Somehow, some part from his mind still couldn't believe it. He shook his head, still amused. He smirked devilishly when he thought of everything he could do with it.

 

 ▤ ▥ ▦

 

 

**Harry:**   
**Hey Nialler**

**Harry:**   
**Searching for more jobs today, wish me luck.**

**Niall:**   
**I'm sure you'll do good** **Harry:**   
**Thanks mate !!**

**Niall:**   
**Tell me about it later !**

**Harry:**   
**Ofc I will :)**

 

Harry smiled before closing his phone, slipping it back inside his left pocket. He really hopes that he would get the job this time.

He hasn't told Niall about what happened earlier. He thinks it better left as a secret. Niall wouldn't believe him anyway, no one will.

He packed his bag with some food and drink, a notebook and his pencilbox just in case. He lifted his bag up, putting it behind is shoulder, carrying it.

He took a deep breath before walking out of his house. 

I walked the road of Doncaster alone. There's isn't much people around. He lives in quiet busy place in Domcaster, so he's pretty suprised that not much people are here. The weather is very nice and calming today, lucky for him.

There were advertisments papers flying, pinned on poles, literally everywhere. But none of them interest him.

He keeps walking, plugging in earphones and listen to some of his favourite music. When he listens to music, it feels like eveything near him is gone. It makes him feel relaxed. He got lost in the carried tunes until he realized he bumped a bulding. "Aagh!" He screeched in pain. He opened his eyes wide. There's a job application flyer that might be just what he needed. What kind of luck does he have..

He picked up the flyer, examining it.

 

**Job Needed:**   
** An Empty Slot for Brand New, Mayne Magazine! **   
**√ Writing experience atleast for a year**   
**√ 18+ years old**

**Interview: 11am-5pm, Hall 5**   
**Last date: 12 July**

  
This is the best thing he'd seen all day. Working at a magazine seems like thebperfect opportuinty for him. He used to be in School Magazine club back in high school, and I guess that counts as an experience. Writing is kind-of his passion, he writes sometimes when he's bored and got nothing to do.

He looked down at his watch, showing that it's 4:56pm and it is now 12 July indeed. Guess his luck isn't the best afterall. "Fuck!" He cursed to himself. He immeaditely went into the building, searching for Hall 5.

This place is so big. How is he supposed to find it fast. He checked his watch again to see 1 minute had passed. His frutation grows even more. After more searches, he finally found it. Without hesitation, he immeaditely open the door. "Am I late?" He asked, running out of breath.

A guy with shaved hair and a face that almost looks like a puppy faced me with a confused look. He's cute, I admit but no one is cuter than Louis. Ugh, here we go again.

"Um, what brings you here?" He asked. And I mentally face-palmed myself for not introducing myself earlier. "I'm here for the-uh, interview?" I said.

The guy smiled saidly, almost in pity. "Sorry, the interview is closed.." He said calmly, making me frown. This is my only chance, I had to do it. "Sir, please. Just one chance. Please!" I pleaded. The guy looks like a nice guy, I really sure hope he is too.

"Please.." I added.

He didn't look so sure at first, but after a comfortable silence he finally made his last decision. "It's ended. I'm deeply sorry. You should've came earlier"

My heart crushed. I nod sadly, making my way home in dissapointment. I don't want to argue and cause an issue. It's late, maybe he'll continue searching for more tomorrow. He sighed deeply.

 


End file.
